Open Letter

Dear Drunk Guys in Front of Me at a Concert,

                I understand that the excitement of a concert can cloud your judgment as to how many drinks is an appropriate amount. Then again, it may be the excitement of the concert mixed with the previous alcohol consumption from the bar down the street. I could have sworn they put a limit as to how many drinks you can buy at a concert. They do that at a Twins game, and I know that because I’m sure my dad and his friends have hit that limit numerous times. What is the limit here, huh? Seven?  What really puzzles me is that it is the same guy going back to pick up an arm full of drinks every time. Doesn’t the worker selling him the beer grow a little suspicious when this idiot returns every third song for another round of four beers? What really cracks me up is that I can hear every word of your conversations because believe it or not, I am sitting right behind you. Do you even know what is coming out of your mouth, or how loud you are mumbling? Well, I do, and I really don’t care to hear about how your girlfriend is coming over after the concert, and of course all the other details that comes with that tidbit of information.

                Maybe if we were at a U2 or AC DC concert being obviously intoxicated would not be as frowned upon, but we are, in fact, at a Taylor Swift concert. There are twelve year old girls dressed up in sundresses and cowgirl boots, and twenty five year old women in braids and tight plaid shirts trying to act like twelve year old girls. I am truly scared for that young girl and her family sitting next to you guys. I don’t know if you are at all aware that your moron friend on the left just leaned over to that little girl and tried to strike up a conversation with beer in hand, and the little girl’s mother grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her away from the “scary man.” Everyone is standing, and given you are large adult men with cowboy hats and dancing stupidly, I can’t exactly see, and therefore wouldn’t know why the crowd suddenly began to cheer louder. Maybe you took the hint from the glares of parents around you guys, because a little over halfway through you got up and left, never to return (to those seats, anyway).

 Sincerely,

The second half was great!